Why Introverts Don’t Like Phone Calls
Introverts absolutely hate phone calls. In fact, many introverts will actively avoid making phone calls. When they receive phone calls, they’re more likely to let the call go to voicemail than to answer. While it might be easier for some people to blame anxiety, even non-anxious introverts dislike phone calls.
In the article below, we’ll detail six reasons why introverts don’t like phone calls. We’ll also walk through a few suggestions to help introverts manage unavoidable phone calls.
6 Reasons Why Introverts Don’t Like Phone Calls
There are several reasons why introverts don’t like phone calls. While not all these reasons apply to all introverts, these are the top six reasons why phone calls and introverts don’t mix.
1. Phone calls are almost always interruptions.
Studies show that introverts are often more easily distracted than extroverts. Because of this, most introverts have an intense dislike for distractions. When distractions arise, they prevent introverts from getting tasks done. This is especially stressful for introverts who are working to meet deadlines.
Most phone calls are interruptions, even phone calls from coworkers and employers. An introvert who feels obligated to answer a phone call may feel even more resentful about the interruption, especially if the phone call seems to have no real purpose.
This problem can be lessened by scheduling phone calls. However, most introverts still dislike phone calls even when they’re scheduled.
2. Phone calls involve a lot of small talk.
Small talk is incredibly annoying to introverts. Since most introverts prefer deep conversation over shallow small talk, the socially acceptable small talk in phone calls can feel tedious and unnecessary to them.
Think about your average phone call. Someone calls you. After initial greetings, the person calling might ask how the other person is, which requires a response. Before you know it, a minute or two of small talk and pleasantries have passed before the reason for the call is even made known.
While most extroverts have no problem navigating all that small talk, it can be especially tedious for introverts who use up valuable energy during this type of communication. It’s not just annoying, but physically draining for introverts to take phone calls.
3. Most phone calls could have been text messages or emails.
It’s perfectly acceptable to send a quick question through text message, email, or instant messaging. Instead of walking through all the social expectations of a phone call, sending a short and direct message allows both parties to communicate what needs to be said in much less time.
This is especially true for non-urgent matters. While most introverts will understand a phone call for something that needs an immediate answer, they’ll be rightfully irritated to answer a call about a non-urgent matter. This is especially true for short conversations that would be perfect for text messages.
While most introverts learn to be flexible in workplaces seemingly designed for extroverts to thrive, they’ll have a lot of appreciation for people who understand their preference for digital communication. People who respect their boundaries and use digital communication when appropriate will set up their introverted coworkers for success.
4. Phone calls don’t give introverts time to think through their response.
Introverts are big thinkers. Unlike extroverts who sometimes say the first thing that comes to mind, introverts carefully think through their responses. Phone calls don’t give introverts the time they like to think about an issue before a response is demanded.
One-on-one phone calls are especially hard because of this. If someone asks an introvert a question on a phone call, they demand an almost immediate response. When an introvert cannot deliver, the silence between the two parties can grow increasingly uncomfortable.
There was a counselor offering a seminar for extroverts married to introverts. One of the best takeaways from his seminar was a tip regarding communication. He told the extroverts in the room to silently count to five after asking a question, allowing for complete silence between parties. That was the minimum amount of time their introverted partners needed to think through and begin their response.
While five seconds may seem like a long stretch for extroverts, it’s incredibly fast for introverts to think through a response. Digital communication gives them the space they need to come up with an answer. Phone calls rarely afford this space, adding to an introvert’s distaste for that communication method.
5. Phone calls don’t allow introverts to observe a person while talking to them.
When we asked an introvert why he hates phone calls, his first response was, “They can’t tell that I don’t want to be on the phone. And if I call someone, I can’t tell if they want to be on the phone or if they’re as annoyed as I am when I get calls.”
Introverts often rely on body language to help them respond to communication. While a lot can be observed through a person’s tone of voice, the lack of body language makes phone calls particularly difficult.
Most people know their introverted loved ones are listening by their body language. In-person communication allows an introvert to quietly listen, showing through their posture that they’re listening and interested. Phone conversations take away this option, leaving introverts unable to use body language to communicate.
6. Phone calls seem to drag on forever.
There’s not only small talk at the beginning of a phone call, but an endless cycle of small talk at the end of each call. Unless the other person is getting a call, it can feel impossible to get off the phone.
How do you end an unexpected phone call without sounding rude? What do you say if you really need to go but don’t want the offend the other person? Questions like these swirl in introverts’ minds whenever they make or receive a phone call.
5 Quick Tips to Help Introverts Manage Phone Calls
Sometimes phone calls are a necessary evil. If any of the six reasons above resonated with you, you’ve probably thought about ways to avoid phone calls altogether. Short of moving to a deserted island, here are five quick tips to help you manage the phone calls in your life.
1. Adjust your phone’s ringtone.
Make phone calls more pleasant by making your ringtone something you’ll enjoy hearing. You can also use silent mode to avoid the sound of the ringing phone altogether. For introverts who feel overstimulated by phone notifications, silent mode is a lifesaver!
2. Provide your email address instead of a phone number whenever possible.
You’ve probably filled out forms that ask for contact information. When allowed, choose to provide your email address instead of your phone number. This way you’ll get more emails than calls.
3. Let people know you prefer text messages over phone calls.
Not all calls are work-related. Let friends know that you strongly prefer text messages over phone calls. When you give your phone number to new friends, make sure to tell them about your preferences.
4. Record a voicemail message that tells callers to either email or text you instead.
This lets people know that the best way to get ahold of you is through written communication. If they really need to talk through something with you, you can always find a time to call.
5. Respond to phone calls with text messages.
You don’t have to answer the phone just because it’s ringing. It’s okay to follow up a phone call with a text message, especially if you’re not in a good position to take a call. We hope these tips help you avoid unwanted phone calls.
While you can’t avoid phone calls altogether, these methods can help you move communication to a platform where you can thrive!